Touched by a Nanny: Angelita Fechino

As told by and to Donna Robinson:I first met Angelita Fechino at a NannyPalooza conference which is a small conference where you get a chance to really get to know each other.  She was sitting with a group and when she said she was a newborn care specialist out of New York, we struck up a friendship as I am in New York quite often.  What drew me to her was the discussion on the conferences needed more diversity and how many do not understand the barriers of Hispanic nannies.  That stuck in my brain and later talking to my daughter she reminded me that we do not have to think about those things being born white middleclass. We don’t often go out of our way to understand another culture.  I didn’t want to be one of those people. I knew this was a very special person who would help me understand.  We had a lot in common because we both had our own business and we both liked to think “out of the box”. The next time I was in New York we met for lunch and that was the start of a lasting friendship. Her story is inspiring, but her determination and her commitment to her dreams brought her a long way and I want to share her story so that she can be an inspiration to you as well.  .As a teenager, Angelita felt she wanted to follow her mother’s footsteps in the medical field working with newborns.  Her mom discouraged her as she felt Angelita was just too sensitive to deal with the life and death of the neonatal ward.  Her family was big on education so she went to college and got her BA in Foreign Language Ed and Translation and Interpreting focused on English and French.  She graduated with honors.  She said she was a people pleaser and struggled with the self confidence that would have allowed her to stand up for what was really going to make her happy. Angelita is going to share her story  of how she went into the business world and became very successful but still broke away to start a career working as a nanny with newborns an later a Newborn Care Specialist before she even knew that career had a name. Angelita says:While in college in Chile in 2000, I got a job in a hotel as a Phone operator, then I was moved to Front Desk. But I was too short so they moved me to sales which wasn’t my thing! I moved within the company to become a Housekeeping Supervisor but was moved back into the Business Centre (that was a full state of the art office facility and it was like being personal/executive assistant of different guests). That Hotel was next to the Government Palace so it was pretty iconic to work there. While working there I met an executive for Sam Ash Music and started working assisting in different cultural matters and coordinating meetings and things while they were doing a Market Research over there. Then they brought me to Miami to do translation into Spanish of some of their catalogues. I then started to come to the US occasionally on vacation and decided I wanted to move here. It didn't happen for a while as I started working in the Mining Industry (main activity in Chile) as a Translator and Interpreter and Executive Assistant. I got to meet many wonderful people. My real passion was put aside, which was still working with pregnancy, birth and newborns. I was an only child and didn't really have any major experience until my best friend got pregnant. I fell in love with that special time and I "doula-ed" her without even knowing that was a thing (that was 16 yrs ago when I was 20 at the time). I wanted to be around newborns, I wanted to tend to moms and I knew other than doing it on-the-side in Chile, if I wanted to really become a professional I had to move to the US. (Australia and Canada also crossed my mind).I moved to the US in 2007 as I applied to work at Marriott online and they called me, I explained I was willing to move and they said it was up to me to figure out how to do it. I went to the US Embassy and showed them my job offer and proof I could afford to move. I quit my job, gave away most of my things. One month later I arrived in New Jersey and started working the overnight shift at the front desk of the Marriott. I also started to work as a nanny to a newborn during the day. Even though I got promoted to Front Office Supervisor/Overnight Manager in less than 6 months I never thought I wanted to stay on that career path.  I was becoming more and more convinced than ever that newborns was "my thing".” Donna Robinson says:Can you imagine how difficult it is to give up a successful career to go into a field where you never know when you will have a job? She said the first couple of years she worked mainly on instinct and read everything she could that would guide her. She realized she needed more education to be the best and did a NCS course in NY. She felt that the course was lacking and brought nothing new to her knowledge base. She felt she could not call herself a NCS until she had the correct training. How is that for integrity?She said that while she was attending trainings and interacting with others in her field, she felt out of place.  She respected their views but realized she didn’t always share their views on newborns. So she did what she was best at—seeking out education that would enable her to be the best.I am so impressed with her continued desire to educate herself.  After the INA conference last year she became a Happiest Baby Educator. She also had become deeply interested in being a Doula and started training with a wonderful Dona International Doula. When she told her she believed “Doulas are born, not made”, she knew at last she had found her calling. She started with a passion to seek out training.  She did Labor and Postpartum Doula Trainings, she became a Lamaze Educator and completed training as a Lactation Counselor. She found a glitch when she failed one of the tests but she hasn’t given up and will continue to study “till she makes it!She said that many times as she attended trainings and interacting with others, she has felt out of place as she didn't always share some of the common beliefs others in the field held, but she respected other's points of views as she said “we're all individuals after all.”She also became a CPST. She did a seminar in Postpartum psychosis and several other webinars in many other subjects related and is currently attending an international lactation conference online.She did training as a Labor doula with Prodoula as well and is planning on doing the Sacred Pregnancy. She offers this advice:  ‘I say do your research and find the right institution that shares your vision or train with them all and find your own values”.Sometimes I get dizzy listening to her next “goal”!  She is just so amazing with her deserve to always be learning.  For example, she said she will also be training as placenta encapsulation specialist and belly binding and several other trainings this year. She does this she says “while working a lot of hours every week, trying to keep my sanity and my family together and my beloved doggies well-cared for”..She told me she feels blessed by her journey.I knew she had a bad accident in 2009 where she was told she might not walk afterwards. But after months of hard physical therapy and a cervical replacement later, she said she was happy to be standing and keep moving. In three months she was back working with a newborn even though her mobility and strength were very limited.She said that life was never be the same after her accident.  She still struggled with chronic pain. She said it was very difficult to “clean herself from pain management meds”. For a couple of years they were the reason she could keep working and moving forward as pain was excruciating.She admits she had to break some barriers as sometimes she felt judged just for been Hispanic. She felt at times the pay offered was lower than it would have been if she had not been Hispanic. Yet, rather than being bitter, she feels she can help others by continuing to break down this barrier.  Her optimism has always amazed me.She found that by offering herself as a volunteer in a Hospital, she got the opportunity to start a very intense Internship. This would lead to a part-time job preparing material for the childbirth department and she started teaching classes to expecting parents. She found she truly loved teaching. She said, “I have put my heart and soul into learning and I feel honored to be able to give back to others. I love that I can help them gain the confidence they need as new parents. We talked about our friendship and she told me I was someone she looked up to as she found me strong and honest and that we share ideas that might not be industry standard but that we stay true to ourselves. I just kept thinking, “my dear YOU are the inspiration!”I am always touched by Angelita.  We meet when I am in NY and she brings a smile to my face as we share and laugh together.  She touches my heart and makes me so proud of our profession.In closing, I asked her has she met all of her goals now. “Well, she said, I want to become a professional trainer/educator and travel to South America and other places someday. I would like to open their minds and hearts to do some things differently than what is now neonatal care.  I want to become a mother more than I want to breathe but only God knows if it will ever happen...I want to keep growing as a human being and I want to always be able to be amazed by small things.”I ask you now, are you not touched by this nanny? 

If your life has been touched by a special nanny, please send your submission to nannytransitions(at)g(mail)dot(com)

Touched by a Nanny : Janna Jones

Touched by Janna Jones
Submitted by Donna Robinson

Janna runs a home day care.  Many may not consider this a “real nanny”.  In fact, she talked about this at a conference. She loves the workshops and truly wants to constantly upgrade her skills. “I know some might not think I am a nanny”.  I had to cut her off right there.  I told her that it was obvious she had a passion for children and she was helping parents who could not afford a nanny but wanted to bypass the big childcare centers.  She didn't just sit them in from of a TV!  She has organized activities and tries to do outings when the numbers allowed. She will stretch herself when a parent calls in a panic and needs to drop a child off.

Doing MAD money takes time and money.  I try to plan a little as the year goes along.  Janna Jones touched me through the years with offers of “how can I help you?”. She constantly donating something to MAD or the auction.  This year when I had a big MAD event, she and I texted 3-4 times a week with items she was able to get by using her gift cards.  I once said, you should use these for yourself!  She brushed it off that she bargained shopped and these would be great for MAD.  She doesn't ask for any credit for her efforts.   She just wants the nannies to have a great experience.  She appreciates their hard work and how hard it is to get the finances for many of them to come to a conference.  I thought at one point, this is truly a giving person.

This conference a lot of my personal extra income went into MAD.  It was a special anniversary for me and I put all my emotions into MAD to help me cope.  It was private and while I didn't explain, it bothered Janna I wanted to do the Dolphins but might not be able to do it.  The next thing I knew, she and Cindy Wilkerson had paid it for me!  I am not used to being on the receiving end and yes, I was a little choked up.  This person, who worried sometimes she was not seen as a real nanny reached out to make sure  someone in her Sisterhood was shown sincere love.

Janna to me, is a real member of the Sisterhood.  When not doing MAD she is giving things to the Auction so we can have a great experience and raise money for a worthwhile children's charity.

It is her dedication to this conference and NannyPalooza, learning as much as she can to help her children that continues to touch my heart.

Thank you Janna for touching my heart and for your devotion to the Sisterhood  of nannies.

The Transition of the Online Nanny

When you stay in an industry for 30 years you see lots of change and lots of transition.
So much of that transition has been good but today I wanted to share something that has been heavy on my heart and get people talking about it.
So please head over to Regarding Nannies
and read my article The Transition of the Online Nanny

Touched by a Nanny:Kenda Horst

 submitted by Marni Kent

As a nanny of many years, I have, like many of you, moved to a new city and state. In 2009 when  I moved to San Francisco I  settled into work just fine but there was always that need to connect with other  nannies for play dates, professional support and of course “Girl Talk”
 Another  nanny friend Deirdre Bellows told me about a nanny named Kenda I should get to know.
 Our charges were a few months apart so we had a lot in common. We did lots of playdates and outings and had similar work ethics. We became good friends.
Kenda is someone who does not seek recognition for her work as a nanny but as a nanny she is a great example of what a professional nanny should be.
She also deserves recognition for her ongoing work as a volunteer in the LGBT community.
As a nanny she is a child advocate, nutritionist, cook, and nanny whisperer. Even my 3 year old usually shy charge loves to be with her.
 She and her longtime partner are always willing to open their home to others.
Kenda became my friend when I really needed another nanny connection and my life is forever changed because she is my friend.
Kenda Horst is someone you should get to know and she has touched many families and children for over 20 years. She has my deepest respect, and I'm glad to call her my peer and good friend!

If you would like to write about a nanny who has touched you, please email nannytransitions(at)g(mail)dot(com)

Touched by a Nanny Kim Dillon

Submitted by Donna Robinson

Touched by Kim Dillon

In 2001 I became the traveling nanny.  I had no idea what I was doing--just an idea. I found the INA annual conference for 2002 and living in Florida, I decided to attend.  Sasha of Nannies and More called and asked if I would co-workshop with Kim Dillon on Alternative Careers for Nannies.  I was pretty scared as only in business for 6 months but figured I would just follow Kim’s lead!  It seems my quiet shy Kim was expecting same of me.  She was one of the first of her kind to take newborn care on the road and became my mentor.

She did more than encourage as she gave me jobs when she had to leave and they still needed someone.  It was terrifying to follow a nanny everyone loved!  She encouraged me to believe in myself and she was always a phone call away if I needed advice.  After the job, she would call me with feedback from the clients.  She never failed to make me feel good about myself.  Through the years she was my best cheerleader and to this day she watches over me and tries to help if I need work.

Fourteen years of friendship would be enough to qualify for Touched by a Nanny. But in 2010 she gave love a new meaning.  We had lost our son to cancer and we were just trying to survive emotionally.  You know that "face" you put on for the world?  Kim looked right past that and into my soul.  She was busy and didn't often have time off but she made a 3 day weekend possible to travel from Houston to Austin to see us.  I didn't feel I could handle a visitor but Kim pretended not to hear and came to help us heal.  I consider that the turning point of surviving grief.  She held me, let me cry and then would say “we need to go get some barbeque" and forced Jim and I to go out.  She would even make us smile at a time when laughter was not possible.  Her last day she pulled me aside and said "we need to take Jim to a movie.  We will let him pick one of those action movies.”  She told him we were all going to the movies as a treat from her.    She would not let us pay.  By the time we said goodbye, I felt like a tiny chip of pain had been erased.  Jim is not easily touched but as he held me that day, he said “you have a great friend.  She didn't have to do that..”

I was not just Touched by a Nanny, I was Healed by the Touch of a Nanny.  I love you Miss Kim!

Touched by a Nanny: Stephanie Felzenberg

Submission by Cindy Wilkinson

     A nanny’s professional life can have challenges that are unique to our particular kind of work.  The isolation that comes along with working in a private home, rather than in a traditional workplace, is one of those special challenges.  Which leads me to the important work of Stephanie Felzenberg.

     In 1993, Stephanie began her journey as a professional nanny.  With her home base in Montclair, NJ, she has served many families in that region, caring for her charges for the past two decades. Stephanie also saw the need for connecting nannies to one another.  She understood our need for sharing, not only new information and educational ideas with one another, but also tackling some of the more difficult aspects of this profession. 

     So, in 2001, Be The Best Nanny Newsletter was born.  It was a publication she created for nannies, enabling them to share, learn, and network with one another.  And now, in the age of the internet, Be The Best Nanny has evolved into a popular blog.  You can also find Be The Best Nanny on Facebook as well, where she has over 4,000 likes.  Her mission for continually finding new topics for discussion, and added guest writers contributing to the education of nannies, has had an extraordinary impact on our industry!

     Stephanie and I have been friends for most of her nanny career.  We have been roommates at both International Nanny Association and Nannypalooza conferences.   I truly admire her for the tremendous work she has done, both as a nanny and as an editor/blogger.  But, I find her passion for fostering the camaraderie of nannies as equally important. 

     While I was vacationing in the New York area several years ago, Stephanie played the perfect host for me during the first days of my trip.  She had planned a surprise excursion into the theater district for me, where we saw a performance of Mary Poppins on Broadway.  The following day, we met up with nanny friends from as far away as Westport, CT for a cruise around the city. 

     Stephanie’s role as a mentor expands beyond the written page and into the lives of those who know her personally.  Her efforts to provide nannies with a stronger voice and a connection to others in our profession, has benefited us all greatly.  And, this contribution, which she has made, and is still making daily, will affect the lives of countless nannies for the better ! 

    If you have a nanny you would like to write about please email nannytransitions(at)gmail(dot)com

Touched by a Nanny: Clelie Bourne

Submission by Cindy Wilkinson

     Clelie Bourne is a long-time newborn care specialist, one of the pioneers in this area of the nanny profession.   She has cared for newborns, often those from multiple births, for over two decades.

     As with most of my nanny friends and colleagues, I first met Clelie at a nanny conference.  Being that she is from the state of Kentucky, I was instantly drawn to her warmth and openness; it’s a part of her southern charm that defines her no-nonsense, yet caring personality.

     Over the years, Clelie has become one of my most influential mentors.  During a past job search of mine, I was considering a move to her home base of Lexington, KY.  Via a couple of phone calls, she shared with me everything I was curious about in her neck of the woods, painting an elaborate picture for me of that part of the country.  

     Clelie and I have always had a “just call me with any question” kind of relationship.  Whether it was a specific question about infant care or my need for a listening ear to work through a more complex issue, she has always served me as a most trusted sounding board.  I appreciate her direct and honest approach. Sometimes I have found her guiding me to a conclusion I have known in my heart all along, as only a close friend and someone who truly knows you well can do. 

     I will end these accolades of my friend Clelie with one of my more memorable International Nanny Association Conference stories.  Years ago, I suddenly found myself homeless at our hotel in Dallas.  My INA conference roommate had greeted me at our door that her husband would soon be arriving to share our hotel room with her… a last minute decision.  As I wandered the halls of the hotel at 11:00 PM, teary eyed and with suitcases in hand, I came across Clelie and her roommates, Janine Gardner and MaryAnn Meddish.  Without any hesitation, they reassured me that they could make room for me in their room and took me in.  My problem was quickly solved by this act of generosity and TLC, an act I have always greatly appreciated and never forgotten.  We have often laughed at the various scenarios I might have faced, had they not rescued me that night!

     Our mentors will serve us in many different ways.  Clelie Bourne has provided me a trusted confidante.  She is someone who I can bounce off new ideas and always get an honest response; she is someone who will keep any of my concerns in strictest confidence.   And, above all else, she is a most loyal friend.   These are the mentors who will impact our lives the most: those who provide us with wisdom, support, and lasting friendships.  Thank-you Clelie!

If you know a nanny that you would like to see featured here please email
nannytransitions (at)g(mail)dot(com)